Lifeless New Friend

This battle's over.
Open my eyes and see
an enemy soldier staring back at me.
How could it have come to this?
People killing people of their own nationality?
No need to question now.
I'm alive. His body, just a portion of what he used to be.

The sun is setting. So beautiful.
I hear jets overhead.
Friend or foe? Doesn't matter anymore.
Cause they want us all dead.
I pick up the my lifeless "friend's" head (it's all that's left).
This battle's over. It's time to make amends.

It's nearly dark now.
I'm finally at the river.
It's so quiet. Not a sound.
It's warm, but I still shiver.
I say a prayer for my lifeless new friend
his remaining head
and release him into the water.
I ask God for forgiveness.
As what's left bobs up and down
his eyes still stare back at me. Lifeless.

I can't help wondering how they made us come to this.
Neighbor fighting neighbor, friend against friend.
I have no answer as he floats away
except to think they want us all dead.
The bastards won't be happy until
my life comes to an end.
I think I'll be joining you soon
my lifeless new friend.
Floating down this river.
Just a portion of what I used to be.
As lifeless as you, my old friend.

"Everybody Hurts" from The Corrs

Well, as long as I've been questioned about the lyrics to "I Was", on the subject of letting it all go, and giving up, I thought I'd pass along this little song that ALWAYS seems to comfort me whenever I'm feeling really down. I pop the "Unplugged" DVD of the Corrs in and listen to this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nkp-U36c_wo
When you are feeling down (Carolyn H-T?), play this wonderful song. Here are the lyrics.

"Everybody Hurts". The Corrs

When your day is long
And the night
The night is yours alone
When you're sure you've had enough of this life
Well hang on

Don't let yourself go
Cause everybody cries
And everybody hurts
Sometimes

Sometimes everything is wrong
Now it's time to sing along
(When your day is night alone)
Hold on, hold on
(If you feel like letting go)
Hold on
If you think you've had too much of this life
Well hang on

Cause everybody hurts
Take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts

Don't throw your hand
Oh, no
Don't throw your hand
When you feel like you're alone
No, no, no, you're not alone

If you're on your own
In this life
The days and nights are long
When you think you've had too much
Of this life
To hang on

Well, everybody hurts
Sometimes, everybody cries
And everybody hurts
Sometimes

And everybody hurts
Sometimes

So, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
(Everybody hurts
You are not alone) 

Hold On Folks. They're Only Lyrics!

Ok folks. You REALLY need to remember, they're only lyrics. Some written today, some written several years ago. "I Was" are simply lyrics I made up. There was not (and is not) ANY intent to do ANY harm to myself. They are simply lyrics. As an example, here are the lyrics from an Elton John song called "Goodbye":


And now that it's all over
The birds can nest again
I'll only snow when the sun comes out
I'll shine only when it starts to rain

And if you want a drink
Just squeeze my hand
And wine will flow into the land
And feed my lambs

For I am a mirror
I can reflect the moon
I will write songs for you
I'll be your silver spoon

I'm sorry I took your time
I am the poem that doesn't rhyme
Just turn back a page
I'll waste away, I'll waste away
I'll waste away, I'll waste away
I'll waste away, I'll waste away 


And here's another Elton John song: "Someone's Final Song"

He died when the house was empty
When the maid had gone
He put a pen to paper for one final song
He wrote - Oh babe, it's the only way
I know it's wrong but I can't stand
To go on living, to go on living, living life this way

And I don't know what the time is
Or what the next line is
Or how you're going to take the news
But if I had my life again
I wouldn't change a thing
I'd let nobody, I'd let nobody
Stand inside my shoes

Something's gotten hold of me
This home is not the home it used to be
I've gathered dust like the dying flowers
And I've drunk myself sober
After hours and hours

After hours and hours

Gee. Bernie Taupin is still alive? How come???? Because they were just lyrics!

So, thank you for your concern, but honestly, I'm fine and looking forward to the future. There will be much to experience in the near future. And I don't want to miss it, good or bad.

I Was

Though I never moved mountains,
and I never changed the world.
In writing these words, helps me realize
I couldn't and I didn't, but at lease I know
I was.

I never had offspring.
No one to depend on me.
Never heard the word, "Dad."
Just as well, I would have been a bad one..
Yet, I've tried to believe
 I was.

Was always afraid to leave this earth
for heaven one.
Always feared of crashing down.
Now it doesn't matter.
Just hope I may make Heaven three
when it's time.
Just hope He understands for all my flaws, and  tries  to believe
I was.

To all who have known me
I hope I didn't cause too much hurt.
If I did, I apologize. I was always unwise.
Which is why it's time for me to go.
To the other side.
Though as I leave, in the future, I hope someone, anyone remembers
I was.

My name forever in my divorce decree.
The IRS will forever know me.
Never to be a stranger to the State Police.
Oh yeah, I was.

I thought I could make it to the end.
But I now understand you don't
make up your own timeline,
regardless of the prayers you send.
I'm just thankful
I was (wasn't I?).

To those who've believed in me

I'm sorry I let you down.

I never meant to hurt you.

Please forgive me. I couldn't help that

I was.

Time for me to end
this part I've played.
It's truly time for me to pay.
Time to sleep until Judgement Day.
I just hope God doesn't leave me behind
and remembers that I was when he calls me.
And He can forgive me.

Will anyone remember these final words?
Will anyone remember that
I was?